Breaking news: George Zimmerman eats 3-egg omelet

This article is from Jewamongyou. It is being reblogged here with his permission.

September 6, 2013
Breaking news: George Zimmerman eats 3-egg omelet

George Zimmerman has eaten a three egg omelet sources say. According to his estranged wife, Shelly Zimmerman, George used to eat only two-egg omelets.

This can only mean one thing, explains psychologist Dr. Dale Archer, “Zimmerman, wracked by guilt over his racism, has taken it upon himself to commit a slow suicide by cholesterol.”

The warning signs have been there for a while. Just recently, Zimmerman was seen near a McDonalds restaurant. Before that, he was observed purchasing cheese at a grocery store.

In normal humans, the two types of cholesterol, High-Diversity-Lipids (HDLs) and Low-Diversity-Lipids (LDLs) act differently upon our arteries. But the arteries of a racist are especially vulnerable to High-Diversity-Lipids. The HDLs found in whole eggs can be deadly to racists.


Actual footage of High-Diversity-Lipids (HDLs) attacking Zimmerman’s racist arteries

The fact that Zimmerman now takes an average of 2.4 seconds to respond to a traffic light changing back to green (as reported by our team of Zimmerman experts) also indicates that his state of mind has been compromised. Guilt is the only logical explanation.

Next: What brand toilet paper does George Zimmerman use? Learn what this can mean for America.

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